Beda?

'Cause we're young and we're reckless
And we'll take this way too far
It'll leave you breathless
or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
But I got blank space baby
And I'll write your name

Sudah terlalu sering gue denger orang-orang bilang "Kali ini sangat berbeda. Gue yakin dia orangnya." Yeah right. Gue juga selalu mikir begitu tiap kali rasa cinta sialan itu nimpuk hati gue, bahkan terhadap seorang cowok yang jelas beda "haluan". Apakah itu juga cinta? Entah.
Ketika raga udah lelah dan hati udah kering, apa sebuah perhatian bisa mengalihkan logika dan mengundang cinta? Another silly hypothesis.
Apakah karena teori "tiap manusia beda-beda" makanya ada pendapat kalau setiap kali kita berhubungan cinta dengan orang lain, pasti akan terasa berbeda? Kayak memakai dress yang warnanya sama tapi modelnya beda?
Gue akui setiap gue baru jadian, gue akan berpikir "Ah kali ini pasti berbeda." Tapi setelah gue putus dan gue mengingat ke belakang, hey, semua mantan pacar gue ternyata nggak beda-beda amat!
So is it that stupid love? Cinta yang membutakan masa awal kita baru jadian? Maybe.

Damn Encounter

This is the third time I had sudden encounter with you. Without any plan or thoughts I meet you again, moreover in a week straight! I still hate the way we bump, though. I hate it. I just hate everything about you. But you just there, looking at me like nothing happened.
"Tiga kaliii aja." You said with awkward giggle. "Sekali lagi dapet piring cantik."
Then you picked up your cup from the cashier.
"Hm."
I couldn't find the best answer for your ridiculous statement. All I want was running away from that damn coffee shop (though it's my favorite coffee shop) after I punch your nose.
Thank you for giving me hatred towards you, but no, thank you for burning that feeling again. Once again.
For whole my life, why can't I be free from your existence?!

Shit Happens Sometimes

"Kepingan puzzle lama yang minta dimainkan, padahal sudah rapi tersimpan dalam lemari. Kunci atau rantai kayaknya nggak bisa menahannya keluar lagi."

I thought it would be different if I ever meet you again. I thought it would only hate I kept for your existence. I thought all would be different. That, once again, my predictions and ridiculous thoughts were only a play toy. You came unexpectedly, out of nowhere. Even when our appearances were beyond different I came out knew it was you and so do you.
That voice. That gesture. That eyes.
Things I already forgot, buried under the solid feeling named hatred. You put down your phone, hung on your call, and stopped your step. In a second you destroyed it all with one simple calling.
"Deb...?"
You called out of curiosity, making sure if it were me.

Oh shit.

Awkward Moment in Birthday Party

Last Monday was my big brother's (he actually is my cousin but yeah) birthday but we celebrated it last night. We had great feast and more than that, my cousin brought along his girlfriend. She's lovely and kind, and turned out we have same ex boyfriend. -_-
"But I hate him."
"Oh so do I."
And then we laughed so hard. Along with the happiness, my cousin dragged me to someplace quiet and asked me if his girlfriend was really the one for him. Because he didn't feel that way.
"Gue sebenernya setengah hati lho sama dia." kata Kakak gue. "Yang nembak pun dia, gue cuma iya-iya aja.."
"Lo sadar gak sih kak, udah bikin PHP orang? Memanfaatkan tampang lo? Menyakiti hati cewek??'
"Lho, yang mau kan dia."

Bukannya salah sih ya.. Tapi kok menurut gue kalo lo udah siap untuk memulai hubungan, suka atau nggak lo harus serius menjalaninya. Kalau dari awal udah setengah hati ngapain dijalanin sampai ngenalin ke orang tua segala? Ini pendapat gue sih ya.. kalo udah sampai dibawa ke acara keluarga yang sifatnya private kayak gini berarti udah serius kan? Karena pasti berlangsung ke pernikahan. FYI, keluarga gue dari dulu pasti menikah di usia segini.

Sepanjang acara, yang gue liat cuma kakak gue ngebully pacarnya sendiri. Dicubitin lah... diomelin lah... disuruh begini begitu... gue jadi kasihan. I mean, she's lovely! I can't stand this kind of situation actually...